Tiny Horses

 I think I finally understand the "tall British men driving Mini Coopers" phenomenon, behold:

Medieval knights rode tiny horses into battle | Popular Science (popsci.com)

I live in "horse country" although development has been pushing out the horse farms for awhile now. There is still a sign on the sidewalk of Main St that says, "Horses Prohibited on Sidewalks" I think now you have to ride them in the bike lane now?

I saw a pony walking with its owner to get the mail the other day which reminded me of this fascinating article I had read. Most horses around here are 14-16 hand Quarter and Arabian Horses. A few painted horses now and then too.

Guns and Ammo Edition

 So a couple of weeks ago there was a military exercise between the U.S. Marines and the UK Marines and some other random countries who aren't important to this post. 

While you may not follow military news perhaps you heard that the UK Marines won with an astounding lack of numbers. There are many theories how this came to be. Not least of all that the UK Marines did a damn stellar job and deserve their victory. Come, not US Marines, no need to be wet blankets about it. As kids these day say "GG", which translates to "Good Game" because apparently those extra syllables are such a waste of time. (eye roll)

I was briefly in U.S. Marine Corps a lifetime ago. [REDACTED]. I was honorably discharged. Sometimes I miss the thrill of the hunt. I was top of my platoon for hand-to-hand combat and combat swimming. Who says cats don't like water? In boot camp they called me "Recruit Ghost" or "Recruit Moon" My platoon was predominately Black and since I never tan and rarely make a noise these nicknames were appropriate.

One night out in Weapons Battalion we'd hoofed it back to the squad bay after finding nothing left in the mess hall to eat but a few peas between us. We had only one Drill Instructor with us who discovered that our top floor squad bay was locked and she didn't have the key. We were order to stay there on the steps.

Normally after evening chow time you do "hygiene." This where you all file in for the briefest of cold showers and then line up in the squad bay naked to be inspected for any injuries to be documented by a Drill Instructor. Standing in the exterior stairwell we had nothing else to do but look around, where upon we noticed a male platoon in the building across from us doing hygiene. DO NOT PISS OFF A DRILL INSTRUCTOR (DI) during hygiene!

Well, the men did it. Their DI got pissed off about something and the men had to run around, push their bunks from one side to the other, jumping jacks, pushups all while their manly bits flapped all about! We may have missed out on dinner, but we got a great show!

Finally they put everything back in order and came back to stand at attention in front of their bunks like you're supposed too. It was then that I made eye contact with a red-haired fella. Eyes widened, a red blush started on his face and ran all the way down his body as he realized he was looking into someone else's eyes, a woman's eyes among a whole bunch of women's eyes! The squad bays have no curtains. Other men in his platoon are coming to the same horrifying conclusion and there is nothing they can do but continue to stand at attention!

This is when our DI arrived with the key. "What the hell you all looking at?" She says as her eyes follow our gaze. "Shiiiiiiiiit." She shakes her head powers up to the door and tells us to get our asses inside double time. Hahaha

Our Patron Saint of Platoon 4053 - Lauryn Hill

Going back is hard to do

 

I have to go back this weekend. Away from the home I've made and back to the place from where I came. Might be fisticuffs. Wish me well.

The nicest Gremlin you could ever meet!

Hooray, I'm here and I can post again! I was experiencing technical difficulties. It happens a lot. My S.O. is a computer engineer and refers to me as his favorite gremlin. He's fascinated at my ability to mess up electronics with a touch.

I once had a coworker whose computer had gone black. Several people tried to fix it. I strolled up and said, "Because I like you, I'll help you out." I literally put one single finger on the top of the monitor and it came back to life, with five people as my witnesses that's all I did was touch it. It didn't have any problems after that. (Honestly, I was only joking. I was secretly as surprised as everyone else that it actually worked!) I tried to transfer over to the IT department at one point for a better paying job, because I was already doing the work of our department assigned IT guy's job anyways. He'd even call me from other departments asking for help!

The problem is, I learn by doing and I don't always know how to articulate why or how I know what I know. It makes it hard to fill out higher level job applications as you can imagine. At any rate, this IT guy brings his girlfriend in to meet me. He weirdly wanders off and her and I talk for a short time. They're planning to move to California. "Oh, okay, great. That should be nice." (Can I have his job?)

IT guy comes back and they move halfway down the hall have a quick chat and then come back to me with big smiles on their faces. What's this about then? They want me to be their girlfriend, both of them! This is the first time I learn what a "Unicorn" is. That special third person that appeals to a couple that want to share their relationship with a third person. Before I married,  I had two additional requests to be a second wife or girlfriend. I really don't know what kind of energy I used to give off that would make people think I wanted to be in a throuple. I'm an introvert, having to manage more than one intimate partnership sounds like a lot of work.

If I'd met only her and she had asked me out on a date I probably would have said yes, but not him. I didn't respect him, I didn't find him attractive and I had no interest in being around him. I'm not really sure why a lovely person like her was with him. So I joked that she should stay here with me and he can move to California by himself. Ha,ha,ha.

He was not amused. So not amused that the prick went back to the IT department and squealed about all the times I'd hacked the system whenever someone in our department died or left or whatever and didn't give us access to their passwords. IT would have us waiting days for their benevolent presence to help us out, but hacking passwords isn't about hacking computer logs or roots, its about hacking people. Sitting at their desk and looking around and guessing what their password could be. I get three tries and boom! I always got it on the first or second time. All I have to do is sit and dwell in their space for a short time.

I received two formal reprimands. To prevent further "issues" with the almighty IT department I was reassigned to a different part of the department where I could cause less trouble. Literally, sent to the basement and suddenly I'm this guy from Office Space: 

   

It wasn't all bad. I wasn't alone down there. In fact, all the coolest people in the department worked down there! We'd all stepped on someone's toes and gotten banished, but we made the best of it and became a tight group of coworkers and friends. 

Demons and Doors

 As I slowly revive this writing blog I'll start by reposting some of my original Blogger posts. IDV, I can't find "Setting as a Character" for some reason I think it wouldn't import, but I will come back to making a new version of that post because its still of interest to me.

Below you'll find a post that I'd completely forgotten about, but now I know it to have been the beginning of a recurring nightmare, what I call "The darkness that eats the world", it's inky blackness still tries to bleed through the doorway now and then. As I re-read this all these years later I cried at the mention of  JP's name. Let this serve as a warning. Some doors of the mind should never be opened.

Original post date: July 19, 2007

Demons and Doors

As most of you know I am a regular lucid dreamer, but sometimes I think they go beyond just dreams.  There is one very vivid dream I remember.  It is stored in my memory like anything I have experienced in waking life.  I was in my childhood friend’s house.  I had never dreamed of her house before, but I do dream regularly dream about my grandparent’s house (as does my father), which was just across the street from hers.

It was a very small house, maybe 800 sq ft at most.  In my dream I was standing in the dining room area.  There was a young girl of about five there with me.  She tried to pretend that she was my childhood friend at the age of five, but I knew it was not her.  Sensed she was something else.  There was an unstable energy about her.  And when she spoke, they were veiled words.

She wanted me to take her hand and lead her out the back door.  “You’re big enough, why don’t you open the door yourself?”  I asked.  She insisted I must open the door for her.  Something inside me told me I should not.  If she can’t open the door herself, there must be a reason I thought.  She became increasingly impatient and there was a kind of crackling energy within the room making me very uncomfortable, painful, like a burning sensation.

Finally her anger peaked.  I felt the searing claws of evil scrape the inside of my chest.  I don’t know how else to describe it, just long, jagged claws scraping your through your insides.  I had felt that feeling one before and since one time later.  The gasping pain made me drop to my knees.  There is no defense I know of against such a violation.

When I brought up my head there was a most innocent looking baby laying there cooing.  I had the desire to pick it up and take it out of this horrid place, but I knew it too was not as it appeared.  Then the baby became a cobra that grew to the expanse of the entire room.  It hissed at me to open the door and run away from it.  But I did not, I held my ground and then beside me and slightly behind cowered my childhood friend.  She was frightened and begged me to protect her.

I had always protected her from dangers when we were children.  Now here she stood beside me, begging me to get her out of there.  Still, I knew it was not her.  Then she too disappeared.  The cobra said that I didn’t understand, that I had made a grave mistake, and that I was just one worthless, little being that couldn’t possibly understand all that was around me.  At that warning it left through a portal that had suddenly appeared and then vanished.

I knew it was really gone, the energy was gone, the only energy I felt was my own.  It was small and weak, like  a pin light in a large dark room.  I walked out the back door.  The day was quickly fading into twilight.  I wasn’t sure where I should go.  I decided to walk to my old home, which was only three blocks away.  On the main street there was a small grocery stored named JP’s.  I used to go there often.  As much for the 5¢ and penny candies as I was for visiting JP himself.

The doors were wide open, as JP used to do when he owned the store.  I walked in and there he was standing behind the counter.  A tall man with a stocky build, white cropped hair and be-speckled bright blue eyes.  He always wore faded blue overalls and a white t-shirt, like he should be working on a farm instead of running a corner store.

When I saw him my heart swelled.  “I’ve missed you some much.” I said while fighting back tears.  “I know” he said and flashed me a warm, comforting smile like he always had.  “You know you don’t belong here.” He said firmly, but gently.  “I know “ I squeaked.  He continued;  “There are bad things here, things you can’t fight or survive, you must run home now before it’s too late, before it gets dark.”

I knew he was right.  The semblance of my childhood neighborhood was already starting to crumble away and I could feel horrible things coming in the distance.  It wasn’t just nighttime coming to this place, it was darkness eating the illusion. I gave JP one last smile and sprang out the door like a jack-rabbit. I ran as fast as I could while the pavement stared to fall away into large chunks into black holes.  I made it to my front door and as soon as I opened it, I woke up in my bed.  The daylight was already coming through my window.

I knew then, that JP was dead.  That he had passed away at least a week before.  When I looked at the obituaries in the newspaper it was confirmed.  I’m so glad that I had a chance to have seen him, how nice of him to look out for me, just one last time.